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  • Tamara Cavenett

Want people to like you? Get past the anxiety of meeting new people.

adeiaide psychologist adelaide

Want people to like you? Wan to get past the anxiety of meeting new people.

Few situations are more anxiety provoking than meeting new people. Small talk can be awkward. What are you supposed to say? What if you say the wrong thing? How do you avoid awkward silences?

More importantly research consistently shows that relationships and social interaction are vital to happiness and wellbeing. Social support is one of the largest contributors to the severity, duration and development of depression…

So how do you get people to like you?

  1. Ask questions. Ask people for their thoughts and opinions with genuine curiosity. Do so without judgement, just a genuine curiosity about their beliefs, views, interests and opinions. You don’t have to agree with them, just be interested.

  2. Get people to talk about themselves. It’s their favourite topic. Research shows that people like to talk about themselves and view people who are interested in them as more likeable.

  3. Like them. Studies show that people like those, who like them. So suspend your ego and judgement and try to find something about them to like.

  4. Don’t correct them. Avoid trying to directly correct them and hold your opinion if it contradicts theirs.This doesn't mean that you can never offer a different point of view just do so in a non-confrontational, non-judgemental way and open to their perspective.

  5. Listen. One of the hardest things to do when you’re anxious is to focus on what the other person is saying. So stop thinking about what you just said, or what you’re going to say next and focus on the other person. Hold in your mind the question “What did they say that was interesting and would you want to know more about?” Studies show that asking people to tell you more makes you more likable.

Want to learn more techniques to reduce social anxiety? Contact us.

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